An excerpt of the piece I wrote in the GirlSpring Book!
(PS. Remember to check out my Pop-Up Shop at the end!)
By Jaina Noelle
Many teenage girls wrestle with anxious thoughts. And sometimes those anxious thoughts pop up throughout the day, causing stress, discomfort, and an overload of emotions. How do we deal with these inconvenient ruminations and achieve inner peace? Here are a few tips and tricks I have for you to try.
Firstly, it’s good to be self-aware and recognize what is happening at the moment. Be mindful of the thoughts and emotions going on inside of you. Learning to recognize when you start to feel anxious can be a small step toward taking control. “What triggered me to feel anxious?” Maybe you got a bad grade, and you began to think that you are not smart and that your parents will hate you. Or maybe your friend is having a bad day and you think thoughts like “Is it something I did?” “Maybe she doesn’t want to be my friend anymore.” And even silly thoughts like “She probably doesn’t like me because my shirt is green.” Whenever you begin noticing patterns in your thoughts and feelings, journal them. This will help you take another step toward control and help you to keep records of the process. After the day is done, take out your notebook before bed and write out whenever you can recall having anxious thoughts and feelings. Write what you think triggered it and the emotions that followed. The more you journal daily, you can look back at how far you have come and improved!
Next, let’s learn how to calm down when feeling anxious.
(!!Disclaimer: These tips are not to replace your therapist or medicine. The activities below are only recommendations, and may not work for everyone, but do what works best for you!)
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Activity 1
Calm down.
- 4-7-8 Breathing:
- Inhale for 4 seconds.
- Hold for 7 seconds.
- Exhale for 8 seconds.
- Repeat.
- Breathe:
- Breathe in for 3 counts
- Breathe out for 3 counts
Activity 2
Breath.
- Music:
Turn on some music that gets you grooving, or put on some calming music like Classical or Lofi, to fill your mind with better thoughts.
Fun Mood Boosting Music Playlist
Activity 3
Write it out.
- Write out your thoughts:
Whatever thoughts you may be thinking, write them down. Now of course, you probably have a million thoughts going on all at once, so just write a few of them that pop up in your mind. Once you do that, write a replacement thought to think on.
Example:
- I am so ugly. —> I am beautiful. (Even though I don’t feel that way) I still love and accept myself.
- I am not smart enough. —> I am capable of understanding. Though I feel not so smart, I still love and accept myself.
- She’s better than me. —> She is great, but so am I. I feel like I am less than her. But I still love and accept myself.
Activity 4
Relax.
- Japanese Relaxation Technique (Jin Shin Jyutsu):
Each finger on your hand represents a different feeling. You can use a simple method that works in less than 5 minutes to help calm anxiety or the other feelings below!
Thumb: Helps calm feelings of anxiety
Index: Help calm fear
Middle: Helps to calm anger
Ring: Helps to relieve sadness
Pinky: Helps with self-esteem
Whatever feeling you have at the moment, take the assigned finger and hold on to it with the opposite hand, wrapping all five fingers around it, and adding a light squeeze pressure to the area. Not too tight, but as if you are holding a pencil or a bottle. You can do this off and on for 3-5 minutes. Now see how you feel! When you hold the fingers like this, you are sending energy to your body, which responds to the method helping you to calm down.
Additional Tips
Lastly, it’s important to have a healthy lifestyle that supports you best, while managing anxiety and anxious thoughts. As a teen girl and as a person, you want to be the best version of yourself! Remember that a balanced diet is important. Food can play a big role in your mood. Incorporate more colorful fruits and veggies on your plate, and don’t forget your protein and starch! It’s ok to treat yourself to some fun foods too, just be sure to keep it in moderation. Make sure to get a good workout at least 3 times per week to keep your body moving often. Getting enough sleep is another vital role in your health. Teen girls ages 13 to 18 should be getting at least 8 to 10 hours per 24 hours of sleep. A mood tracker can help you track your daily habits, highs, and lows, and how you feel every day. In addition to journaling, add to the regimen of tracking your mood daily, by writing how you felt on that day and why, if the emotion changed later on, and how you feel now. Doing all these things every day can make a big impact on your mental health. Also having an open and supportive space where you feel comfortable and safe to communicate your feelings is crucial. Make sure to reach out to professional help if your anxiety and anxious thoughts begin to go too far. It’s ok to ask for help, you don’t have to carry the burden alone!
Anxiety doesn’t have to be your identity, you’ve got this.
Jaina
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Anxiety Worksheets
Journal your day and deal with those anxious thoughts with these worksheets! Perfect for anyone who is dealing with anxiety.
Click Here!
Hey, there’s more!
Check out Tips for Managing Stress During School Year by Sloan!
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(image sourced from: freepik.com)
